Stress

Today was the first time i actually lie on a horribly uncomfortable couch, and watch nothing but movies on TV for nearly 10 hours. That of course i think can be related to how terribly work pressured me in the last couple of weeks, or the fact that i have been mad at myself for while now. I know it sounds funny in a way to feel mad at your own self, but it happens. the problem is; when your mad at someone you can simply get away from him the least to make yourself feel better, but when your mad at yourself, well...you really can't do anything but just try to fix things up somehow.

last movie that i watched was Sweeney Todd: The demon barber of fleet street. I never saw the musical before, and i always wanted to watch this movie since 2007 but i just didn't seem to have the time.

i must say though, i love the movie.

No one is perfect.

Its difficult to say that life is sometimes, unfair. while the fact that our lives never stay the same, and is bounded by time; it would simply be impossible for it to be the same.

change, is the right word. I remember a certain year in my life that was close to perfection. it had all the flavors of life in it, and while people consider sadness an unwelcome visitor, sadness will always be there.

Time is a frightening element indeed. our life pass by and evolve beyond our will, because its bounded by time.

i can't imagine a human being who would be willing to give away his life, or end it thinking that it would set him free. i can't imagine that because i know that death is a painful hour. unlike what people think, people dont just shut their eyes closed and that's it.

you run out of air, your body shakes thinking someone is choking you while its actually choking itself. your hands reach for anything, and anyone. you lose control over you body. you can't think of anything except "help me".

no flash backs and no one passes through your head, and just when your body realizes whats going on, you faint.


THANK YOU!

Many thanks to all the amazing magazines and websites who went through all the time and effort to publish my latest project.

I thank AWR (Architecture Workshop in Rome) for their amazing competition, and concern about this cause.

I believe that Architecture should mainly focus on people, because architecture is About 
people. The many challenges that people face in their lives should be faced and considered by all the fields of knowledge and art.


if you can, try raising awareness to this matter. I never was taught about emergency architecture, and i feel sorry for that...

Architecture is People.

V-th Ark on SUCKERPUNCH!!

SuCKERPuNCH also went AWESOMENESS and Published My Project.

here's to SuCKerPunCH !!!







V-th Ark PUBLISHED ON EVOLO!!!

EVOLO went AWESOMENESS Again and published my project !!!!!! 

THANK YOU TONS EVOLO, 





My Portfolio is AVAILABLE !!

hey there people....my portfolio is now uploaded and ready for anyone to view it. check it out in the new and hopefully the not final section in this blog.

thank you...

1ST SHOWREEL NOW AVAILABLE!!!!

hey awesome people, my first showreel is now published in the showreel section above. your time and effort to watch it is sincerely appreciated.  

New Section Available!!!

Hey there everyone, I just added a new section. The competition section will contain all my entries in any competition I participate in. Enjoy the very first Entry: "The V-th Ark".

Awake

do you ever have those experiences where you ....realize every little mistake you made in your life. not only realize....but fear everything else you do afterwards ...fear every decision you make, fear every movement. you become caged in a prison of fear and anxiety.

lately i have been asking the wrong questions in life ....and they made me feel despair...they made me so despair that i fear killing myself. ...did i finally lose my mind....did i finally lose myself ,...

i feel like i want to sit in a corner of a closed room, and cover myself with a thick sheet and stay there for god knows how long.

i am not gonna lie to you, i love life....and i hate it. thats right ... i love it and i hate it. i love it because ....its just beautiful if you look at it from the right perspective. and i hate it because i really don't know one thing about it.

sometimes i imagine Davey Jones approaching me and saying his famous line "Do you fear death??!".

and then i would say..........nothing ....its that moment where i know i need to go to sleep ...

but running to my bed for refugee is not the right choice ....because i get haunted in my dreams by every mistake i made in my life .....and i see one mistake taking me to a brute suffering.

the other night i woke up, and i saw in my dreams one of those times where i treated someone wrong...very wrong .....and that mistake kills me because  first .....it was a long long time ago a decade or so ...and second: ....i can't even remember that person's name anymore ...and i don't know how to reach him by any mean ...just to say sorry ....

i learned it the hard way .....if you do something wrong and leave it behind ...it will make you suffer even if you die.....

i woke up and i just didn't know what to do ....i sat on my bed for quite a while and i couldn't think of way to ..repent....yes repent .

right now i feel like i am the most ignorant person on the planet ......i don't know anything anymore ...every sentence i start with "i don't know".

i need to talk to a Shaikh..........

what if the world would end tomorrow?

here is a question i have been thinking about for a while .....what if the world would end tomorrow?. to be honest i think i would probably pray for a long while...then i would probably smoke a cigarette. i always wanted to to know what it feels to smoke a last cigarette, and i honestly always wanted to know what cigarettes taste like. i wouldn't worry about family that much. i have been with them for my entire life. i think they will be okay for one day. i think i would eventually panic though, but i think when the last minute comes i would grab a paper bag and put it on my head and lay down. like those guys from the movie "the hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy", or maybe i would take a sleeping pill or something. i mean, whats the point of witnessing how you will die?. lets be honest, its gonna be painful, its gonna be a very short show, and you will probably regret it in the afterlife. then again it could be a nice chat topic, people would gather around and each one would tell how he died.

its comedy for me really.....it can't be other than that because lets face it people..... don't tell me that you guys will fall in love with life in the last day. we all know how life is hard and painful and sometimes it just makes you wanna kill yourself. so,....yeah ...lets just go to work and forget about this and live in self denial or something.